Tips to Overcome Imposter Syndrome and Strengthen Your Resilience

Imposter Syndrome by definition is feeling like a fraud and hoping no one around you will find out. It's having feelings of insecurity, anxiety, not feeling good enough, fear of judgment, self-doubt, and lack of confidence.

If these feelings, if Imposter Syndrome is very real for you right now, you are not alone!

January tends to be a season of new beginnings and with new beginnings come insecurities. Along with new beginnings comes a learning curve. It is the learning curve most of don’t take into consideration.

It is human nature for us to doubt ourselves. However, when we let those self-doubt thoughts be our controlling or leading ones, that is when we start down that slippery slope straight into Imposter Syndrome and give control to our inner critic. Overcoming imposter syndrome ultimately leaning into and accessing your inner leadership team and acknowledging your strengths and self-worth. Thereby, showing up as your best self and accomplishing your goals, and achieving your desired success.

In the past few weeks, I’ve had multiple conversations with clients, friends, and family about feelings of insecurities and feeling like a fraud. Worthy of note, I currently have three clients onboarding new jobs. As I’ve seen before, they have mixed emotions of excitement, hope, and self-doubt. 

What I share with you, my clients and is part of my career transition coaching program, anytime you start something new there is a learning curve. It is expected and normal to not know everything or much. Instead of giving in to the feelings of imposter syndrome, reframe the thoughts to embrace the training and be the sponge to learn all you can. 

Marie Forleo said, “ Be humble, not knowing something doesn’t make you a fraud, it makes you a student.” Or I would add, in the professional training world, a professional in training.

Think about that for a moment and let it sink in. There is always room for learning and training. This means instead of feeling unworthy or lacking skills, it means there is room for growth and improvement. 

Furthermore, when you start having feelings of Imposter Syndrome, there are the top tips to combat it.

1. Look for the proof. What evidence is there that you are not good enough, not skilled, not worthy, can’t do it or learn it? Further, were you supposed to know this already? Chances are there isn’t any proof and you are more than qualified. 
2. Create an accomplishment list and review it (often). This is a list of your professional and personal accomplishments with demonstrated examples. (results and outcomes)
3. Choose to reframe this thinking. Reverse the thoughts. Henry Ford said, “Whether you think you can or can’t you are right”
4. Remember and use the wise word of Carla Harris - if you were invited to the “table” then someone of authority believes you deserve to be there. It is your responsibility to use your “seat” well. If you don’t want to believe in yourself on your own, believe in those around you that firmly believe in your skills, strengths, and abilities.
5. Stop comparing yourself to everyone else.  So often, especially with social media, compare ourselves to others. Yet we don’t often have others full story we only have the highlighted version. If you use social media as an example, what you see posted is an edited, highlighted, handpicked feed not necessarily the backstory, the hardships, or the raw footage.
6. There is no shame in asking for guidance, assistance, or help. Ask for it when and as needed.  

Eleanor Roosevelt said, “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent!”

So, don’t give it to anyone - including your inner critic!

Finally, the best strategy to countering imposter syndrome is strengthening our resilience. If nothing else, the past year has taught us to be resilient, show us we can be, that we are able to be flexible, and bounce back. 

Just recently, someone shared with me, “I just don’t have much resilience left.” 

That really hit me. It lingered. I felt it deeply.

I get that. Many of us are hitting our walls and feeling very depleted. 

Here’s the thing, when you find yourself there, it is time to fill up your cup because nothing feeds the inner critic more (which leads to imposter syndrome growing) like an empty cup. 

You have the capacity to adapt in the face of adversity - trauma, health, stress - related to family, friends, or work - but in order to do so, you need to have the belief and bandwidth. This is resilience. 

Strategies to strengthen your resilience:

• Continue to cultivate your belief in yourself. Lean in and access your inner leadership team. (Uncertain of how to do this, this is one of the pillars of my coaching programs. Building your confidence, accessing your inner leadership team, and quieting your inner critic. We address this in Phase I of my 4-phase framework. Curious: learn more.)
• Find someone to talk to about what is going on with you, this could be a friend, mentor, or professional coach.
• Be helpful to others
• Advocate positive emotions
• Let go of perfectionism. (As a recovering perfectionist, I get this challenging.) This is important. The philosophy of progress over perfection is a great mode of doing. Doing your best and forward action will get you much further. Waiting for the right or perfect moment, keeps you frozen in place.
• Be kind and compassionate to yourself. Show yourself grace.
• Track and measure your success. (you can use this as your proof when you counter your alleged fraud accusations). 
• Give yourself credit where and when credit is due. You are your hardest critic.
• Honor your boundaries.
• Make yourself a priority and take care of yourself. This allows you to fill your cup. 

I share these tips with you on how to cope and overcome imposter syndrome and quiet that inner critic. These are actionable steps. I also provide insight and strategies on how to enhance and strengthen our resilience. This past year has been challenging for many of us. Feeling depleted is normal, what you do about it makes the difference. Forward action is key in achieving your goals and taking the next steps to your desired success.

If you need some guidance figuring out to achieve this, I am here to support you. Would you like to have a virtual cup of coffee? Schedule a complimentary call and we can figure out it all out together. #strongertogether #alonetogether #momlife #workingparents #workingremotely #workhomebalance 

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